Career Oriented.

Last week, we had our ORIENT2..a development class where we get to figure out what we want to do after college. Stuff about job hunting, what you really wanted to be. It really got me thinking if still wanted to be an engineer..well, the title of Engr. before your name sounds nice and all and ECE is an attractive (high-paying?) profession…but then I realized that I wanted to be a Graphic Designer….and I shouldn’t have minded back then after High School that I need to go Benilde to take Multimedia Arts and end up having a low paying (but fullfilling?) job. Maybe that’s really what I wanted to be since..or…

I just have this undying urge to be different from everyone else…

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Even casual conversations make me think about where I’m currently standing. When conversations start to take a technical turn…I feel left behind. Maybe my friends don’t realize it, but hearing them talk makes me realize that they’re really cut out to be an engineer…no matter what their test cores or GPAs are. They have certain qualities and skills that make them fit to be an engineer. One of then is very meticulous with regards to details..some of them very analytical…others’ math naturals…(Me? I preffer the arts..currently..)…you may not understand, dear reader, but try spending several terms with these people and you’ll realize what I have.

I may have satisfactory grades compared to them, but I’m now thinking twice If I’m fit to be an engineer. I’m careless, clumsy, not-math-oriented…heck, I’m even starting to get lazy. I get high grades in NON-ENGINEERING SUBJECTS and mediocre grades on the other hand. I’m a 4th year engineering student and I DON’t even have a breadboard. I don’t like assembling circuits because I’m afraid they won’t work. I don’t like computing because I’m afraid my computations are wrong. I’d rather prepare papers than do electronic projects.

As for mangerial careers…at this rate, I think I’m not even fit to be a leader. I’m poor in delegating work..I can’t make people work..it’s either I do most of the work, Or I get a bit bossy. I crack under pressure (or is it a manifestation of another problem..hmm), I lack people skills, I don’t like mingling with people….I would rather follow assigned tasks. I have a hard time expressing myself and my thoughts….I have a hard time getting my points across…I say the wrong things most of the time…(nyeta…ayoko nang maging leeeeder)

I am soo the most frustrated,insecure and nega person in the world… 

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 and that’s probably why I’m having a hard time with people around me. They find me TOO negative. Too pessimistic..

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The law of Ueki states..

“When you do not have the talent for a certain [job], you just have to work thrice as hard to make up for the lack of talent you have..”